The Ego and Resistances to Spirituality: Part Two
I mentioned in November that life has challenges and it was mentioned in the context of laying the foundation for what the ego-child is all about. In meeting the challenges of life, will a person respond via the ego-child or via spirit? The latter involves using your true power, while the former is weakness. I spoke in November quite a bit about ego as the primary resistance to our spirituality and I will continue with that issue here, but I want us to ultimately move beyond ego to our spirituality, to the depth of who we really are. If you spend too much energy focusing on ego you are probably in ego and hating your ego will not bring peace, will not bring you spiritual awakening, for hate is ego. It is important to know how your ego-child functions, and only then can you put the functioning of ego-child into perspective. Once a ‘proper’ view of ego is established you can begin to awaken to your spirituality. It’s not a ‘one-off’ thing to awaken as practice is required. It is the ego-child that wants that ‘one-off’ experience of enlightenment, maybe so that it can start walking on water and be better than everybody else. Let’s look at some more examples of the functioning of ego-child.
When you put a 5-year old child at a table along with other children, and serve them cake, what is the first thing that 5-year old does when he/she sees the portions of cake passed out? He/she will look at his/her piece of cake and then compare it to what everyone else got. Comparison and competition of the ego-child has begun. Who got the biggest piece of cake? Who got the smallest piece of cake? For the ego-child the answer determines the response. Maybe there will be anger, or jealousy, or self-pity. Maybe an outright tantrum will result. Maybe the 5-year old will respond with “ha-ha, my piece is bigger than your piece because I’m special”. Over the years all sorts of difficult experiences, too many to list here, occur that feed the ego-child. Memories are made and are stuffed into the subconscious mind. A pattern of ego-child reactions is built up and carried into adulthood. By adulthood that ego-child often seems to be running the show. It often is running the show rather than just providing input data about the world out there.
In a single moment, memories of the past, memories of the slights done, memories of the pain can burst with anger, jealousy, guilt, fear, shame or all of the above. If you want to transcend that yakety-yak of the ego-child, it will involve letting go of the past. Getting caught up in ego can ensure that you don’t get what you want, it can ensure that your life is a mess, and in the process, it will ensure that you hurt others as well as yourself. We are often hit with ‘whammies’ wherein an event triggers an ego-child response. Suddenly you are filled with jealousy, resentment, anger, guilt feelings, maybe even greed. All too often the first response to a situation or perception, within seconds, is an ego-child reaction. The ego-child reaction fills your days, and maybe your nights, and you want to get even, you want to control and punish, maybe because someone didn’t love you ‘good enough’. It is not a happy, peaceful state. You want to be understood rather than be understanding.
The ego-child involves an inflated sense of self or arrogance. It interferes with a person’s potential and that potential is about Spirit. It has been said that arrogance is low self-esteem
masquerading as confidence. I think most people can recognize that, most people can see ego as an inflated sense of self or a sense of self-importance. I’m not suggesting that you underestimate your value as a human being, for that valuation is human dignity. It is crucially important to meet the challenges of life with your dignity. However, dignity is distinct from the grandiose self-importance of the ego and that ego-child is what must be dealt with. I want to mention several ways to deal with the ego, the last being the ultimate goal of becoming, more and more, your true self.
Deal with your ego-child
First, some help dealing with the ‘whammies’ in which the ego-child attacks you with negativity, rapidly, seemingly out of the blue. Seemingly with sudden onset, something happens, and the ego-child reacts with anger, or jealousy, or fear or whatever constricting emotion occurs for you. It is important to learn how your ego-child functions. No matter how intense the ego-child reaction you have to pause. Take a breath. That ego-child wants love, wants safety, and you need to give it to them. Talk to them. Tell them you have it managed. Tell them you love them. and you have it handled. They are safe. They can have the biggest piece of cake they want. There is no boogey man under the bed. You will protect them and keep them safe. This takes about 10 seconds, and then tune into the ‘heart’, tune into Spirit, turn to love. Tune into your true Self and ask, ‘what would you have me do’? Ask the real you for guidance and follow that guidance. Come from the heart, not from the biological heart, but from the heart, the love you really are. These whammies can occur often but will decrease in frequency and intensity as you apply the process. Be aware. Be alert. Be willing to take back your true power, the true power of Self.
Give negative memories, feelings, regrets to Spirit
Personally, I have come to use a second method to deal with ego-child. I realized that during the day memories, feelings, thoughts were popping up that were not pleasant. Those memories, feelings, and thoughts were often about feelings of guilt, regret, and other such emotions that were out of context regarding my current life and situation. I was really surprised that such things, such issues were still there, imbedded in the subconscious and suddenly coming to the fore. My response was to question “why am I recalling this now? Why am I feeling this now? What do I do with this”? Things were coming up that were from last month, or last year, or 30 years ago. I soon realized such occasions were an opportunity to clean house, so to speak. I did not know what to do with these instances, but I soon learned a simple, and I think profound, way to ‘clean house’. I began giving these memories, feelings, regrets to Spirit. It is a rather ‘cognitive’ approach, but it works for me and I hope others. It is an imaginative technique and imagination is an important part of the power of mind. In essence, I would say: “I don’t know what to do with this. Spirit, you take it as you do know what to do with it”. It works for me and it generates a near immediate sense of release and freedom. This simple method can be applied anywhere, at any time. For example, say I’m brushing my teeth in the morning and some old regret pops up. Give it to Spirit, to God, to your Higher Self, whatever fills your plate. Again, practice is important, but in this practice, you will learn much about undoing the ego-child and engaging Spirit.
Remember the episodes of Oneness and true inspiration
A third approach involves developing a deeper understanding of Self. There is a distinction between ego and personality. Personality is the language by which the soul communicates in the earth plane. So, how do we put the ego-child in perspective? The Buddhist equation goes something like this: it acknowledges that there is suffering or struggles in life. It then says that struggles in life arise out of unfulfillable desires, and the way to eliminate unfulfillable desires is to eliminate self (ego or self-importance). The way to eliminate suffering is to eliminate self (ego or self-importance). It is not about hating the ego or trying to kill the ego. It’s about transcending the ego. Beyond the ego-child, what is your true identity, your true Self, or at least your truer Self? What is the Self that speaks through personality in the earth plane? What is it like? What does it feel like? This is the key: when have you felt Oneness in your life? When have you felt truly inspired? If you can remember that Oneness, that is your true identity. And you don’t want ego to interfere with that truer sense of Self. When you begin to remember that dimension, you are no longer the person you were before. And that is the elimination of the limiting dimensions of ego. That allows your true potential to grow. From that state of grace, the challenges of life are transcended and disappear. Increasingly you will be able to transcend the anger, the fear, the jealousy, the need to control and engage in comparison and competition. The more you can get in touch with your true identity the more you will experience your true identity. You will change. Increasingly, you will grow within a state of grace, without the suffering and struggle.
Use the sounds of the Acoustical Pyramid
It is important for those on the spiritual path to engage in regular, daily meditation. This is where the sounds of the Acoustical Pyramid are quite effective. Working with those sounds helps to cleanse the ego-child. The sounds quiet the yakety-yak of the ego-child. The sounds help you to enter the quiet, the hush, of Spirit. The sounds of the Acoustical Pyramid provide rejuvenation physically and emotionally. The basic subscription level sounds are genuinely helpful and the Advanced subscription level sounds induce an even deeper meditative state. In all these states the ego-child is quieted, and you can float in the endless sea of Spirit. When you come out of the Acoustical Pyramid meditation notice the Quiet Mind. With practice you will more frequently enter those states of Oneness and inspiration that are your true Self.